


Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

by veronamay



Category: Lord of the Rings RPF
Genre: Fairy Tale Retellings, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-07-03
Updated: 2005-07-03
Packaged: 2017-11-27 06:11:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/658802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/veronamay/pseuds/veronamay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A retelling of the classic fairy tale.  Not crackfic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

**Author's Note:**

> This was supposed to be revenge for the utter horror of having [](http://sparkythehamstr.livejournal.com/profile)[**sparkythehamstr**](http://sparkythehamstr.livejournal.com/) and [](http://la-joconde.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://la-joconde.livejournal.com/)**la_joconde** spam me with Domlijah; unfortunately this is the best I could do.

Once upon a time there lived a beautiful and noble queen named Miranda, who was renowned far and wide as the fairest woman in all the land. She kept a magic mirror upon her bedroom wall and each day she would go to it and ask,

_Mirror, mirror upon the wall  
Who is the fairest one of all?_

Every day the mirror would reply,

_My queen, you are the fairest of all._

And Queen Miranda would be content.

One day in the midst of winter she sat embroidering at her window overlooking the gardens, with snow lying soft upon the ground outside. She was gazing out into the grounds and so pricked her finger with the needle, causing three drops of blood to fall upon the ebony window frame. The queen looked down upon the colours and thought, "How I should like to have a child with such colouring! with hair as black as this ebony, and skin as white as the snow, and lips as red as the blood from my finger."

Lo and behold, the very next year such a happy event came to pass. Queen Miranda gave birth to a son, whose hair was the silky black of a raven's wing and whose skin was as pale as alabaster and whose lips were as red as the ripest of strawberries. He had clear blue eyes the colour of a summer sky, and he was as small and quick as the merriest of finches. She named him Elijah, but by his extraordinary looks he came to be known as Snow White. And for some years all in the castle were content, for Snow White was as warm and caring as his mother was proud and noble, and he came quickly to be loved by all.

Then one day, on Snow White's sixteenth birthday, Queen Miranda went to her magic looking-glass and said to it,

_Mirror, mirror upon the wall  
Who is the fairest one of all?_

Instead of replying as it usually did, the mirror said,

_You, my queen, are fair; it is true  
But Snow White is still a thousand times fairer than you._

Hearing this, Queen Miranda was instantly jealous of her handsome son. From that moment on she hated him and looked upon him as the reason her beauty was beginning to fade. She wrestled with her hatred for some long while, but could find no peace within herself; her jealousy was too strong. Finally she brought First Huntsman Bernard to her and ordered him to take Snow White into the woods and kill him.

"Bury him deep in the darkest part of the wood," she said, "but bring back his liver so that I may eat of it and regain my beauty which he has stolen from me."

Bernard was very reluctant to do her bidding, for he too loved Snow White as did everyone else in the land. But Miranda was his queen and he feared her, and so with a heavy heart he collected Snow White and took the lad deep into the heart of the wood.

When Snow White learned what was to be his fate, he began to weep and begged Bernard not to kill him. "I shall run away and stay in the forest and never return," he promised, "if only you will let me live!" Bernard's soft heart counseled him to pity the lad and spare him for his beauty, and he thought to himself that the winter predators would surely find the youth and make a quick end of him. So he let Snow White go and killed a stag in his place, cutting out its liver and bearing it back to Queen Miranda as proof that Snow White was dead.

The queen ordered the liver grilled with salt and ate heartily of it, fancying herself growing more beautiful with every bite. She was content once more, thinking her rival dead and gone and that she was once again the fairest in the land.

Snow White, meanwhile, had run fearfully into the wood and was terribly afraid. It was dark and damp and he became scratched and torn by cruel thickets of hazel and wild roses, until his face and arms were cut to ribbons and his feet were bruised from sharp stones on the ground. Finally he fetched up in a clearing which housed a thatched-roof cottage, which was empty when he tried the door. He went inside and found it furnished for seven people, all of whom must have been of smaller stature even than he. There were seven little beds lined against one wall, and a long table with seven place settings and seven small loaves of bread waiting for supper to be served. Snow White took a little of each loaf of bread and drank some wine from each of the seven little cups, and then tried each of the beds until he found one that suited him and lay down to sleep.

Snow White was unaware that he had come across the house of seven dwarfs, who were hard at work mining for gems underground. He knew only that he was warm and safe and very hungry. But while he slept the seven dwarfs were returning home from their long day's work in the mine, and when they arrived at their house they were shocked to find they had been invaded. There was much exclaiming over the pieces missing from their bread and the wine drunk from their cups, until they discovered Snow White asleep. Then they fell silent in awe at his beauty and wondered at how such a pretty creature had come to be so far into the dangerous forest. They did not wake the lad but let him sleep, for clearly he was tired and sore. Instead they soothed his cuts and bruises with witch hazel and aloe and waited for him to wake.

When Snow White finally woke up he found himself surrounded by seven small men, all of whom were curious about who he was and how he came to be in their house. He apologised quickly for the intrusion, and explained how Queen Miranda had tried to kill him and how Huntsman Bernard had agreed to let him go.

"I have run all day since then," he said, "and I am sore and heartsick and very afraid. I have not felt safe since I left the huntsman, until now."

The dwarfs drew aside for several minutes to discuss something among themselves. When they came back one of them said, "We are willing to let you stay here with us, if you will promise to keep house and clean and cook for us, and mend and wash our clothes and keep things generally tidy. We work in the mine all day digging up precious gems, so you will be alone during the day, but at night we will want supper ready on the table when we return home."

Snow White quickly agreed to this plan, and the dwarfs introduced themselves to her. There was Sean, who was cheerful but not terribly bright; Billy, slight and deft and very fond of taking naps whenever he could; Dominic, who was quick of tongue and who had graceful hands, who sneezed whenever he was near flowers; Ian, an older dwarf with a round face who seemed to scowl a lot for no reason; Orlando, who was a happy young dwarf and always had a smile on his face; another dwarf also named Sean, who said barely a word and blushed rather a lot whenever he looked at Snow White; and finally Andy, who was brash and confident and was the unofficial leader of the group. It was Andy who made Snow White promise to be careful when they were not at home, and to keep a sharp eye out for the queen in case she learned that Snow White was still alive.

"Don't let anyone into the house while we're away," he warned Snow White. "We can't protect you all the time so you will have to look out for yourself."

Snow White swore he wouldn't open the door to anyone, and the dwarfs set off the next day to the mine, content with their new arrangement.

Queen Miranda, meanwhile, woke up the next morning and stepped over to her magical mirror with the greatest anticipation. She smiled to herself and asked it,

_Mirror, mirror upon the wall,  
Who is the fairest one of all?_

The mirror, alas, replied,

_You are still fair, my queen, it is true  
But Snow White in the dwarfs' house is still a thousand times fairer than you._

Hearing this, the queen was enraged to learn that Huntsman Bernard had lied to her and had not killed Snow White. Rather than confront him about it, however, she decided to go to the house of the dwarfs and kill him herself, for that would provide her with much satisfaction. So she sat down to her dressing table and gave herself a disguise.

Snow White was happily tidying up the cottage, humming to himself while he worked, when there came a knock at the door. He tiptoed up to the kitchen window and peered out of it, seeing only an old peddler woman outside.

"What do you want?" he called through the door.

"I am but an old woman trying to sell ribbons," the peddler woman replied. "I have such pretty ribbons, young master – pure silk, and in every colour you could imagine! Wouldn't you like to see them?"

 _Surely this old woman means no harm,_ Snow White thought, and let her in. "Show me your ribbons," he said to her.

"Such a handsome one you are, young master!" the woman cried, stepping quickly inside. "I have the perfect ribbon for your throat, it will match your eyes wonderfully. Come, let me put it on you." So saying, she wound a blue silk ribbon so tightly around his throat that Snow White could not catch his breath and fell down in a swoon. The peddler woman stood over him and laughed, for of course she was Queen Miranda in a disguise.

"That will do for you," she said with a sneer, and left with her basket, leaving the cottage door open behind her.

Soon after it was dusk, and the dwarfs came home to find Snow White lying as if dead upon the floor. They cut the ribbon from his throat and pushed on his chest to start his breathing again, and Snow White woke up coughing and hoarse-voiced.

"It was but an old peddler woman I let in," he protested when they questioned him. "I did not think she was dangerous."

"Let this be a lesson to you," said Ian, frowning fiercely at her. "Take care you do not trust anyone but us, and let no-one in again."

Snow White promised faithfully to heed this advice and then set about preparing their dinner. The next day the dwarfs went off to work as usual, though not without casting a few worried glances back as they left.

Queen Miranda woke up that day, assuming her plans had succeeded and Snow White was finally dead. She stepped over to her mirror and asked it,

_Mirror, mirror upon the wall,  
Who is the fairest one of all?_

And once again the mirror answered,

_You, my queen, are fair, it is true,  
But Snow White is still a thousand times fairer than you._

The queen could not believe her plan had failed, but immediately decided to make another. She sat and thought for a day and a night, and finally a plan for a poisoned comb came to her. She disguised herself again, as a weary washer-woman, and set off into the wood once more carrying a loaded laundry basket.

Snow White was hard at work making bread when he heard singing coming from the front stoop. He looked out the kitchen window and saw a woman sitting there, holding a beautiful tortoise-shell comb up to the light. The woman noticed Snow White and smiled at him, beckoning with one hand.

"I'm not allowed to let anyone in," Snow White said, looking wistfully at the comb.

"Quite right!" said the washer-woman. "And you do not need to; you need only come and sit here with me, and I will comb your hair with this pretty comb." And again she held it up to the light, letting Snow White see how it glistened and shone. He looked at the woman carefully and did not recognise her, and so thought her safe. He went outside and sat down, and she began to comb his raven-black locks. As soon as the comb became caught in his hair, he fell victim to its poison and slumped over into a heap on the ground.

The disguised Queen Miranda laughed down at him a second time. "They will be too late to save you this time!" she declared, and took off back to her castle singing.

The dwarfs returned as usual at dusk and found Snow White again lying near death outside the front door of the cottage. Sean silently found the poisoned comb in his hair and removed it, breaking it to pieces with a hammer and burning it to ash. Snow White began to recover as soon as the comb left his hair, and was soon awake, though pale and weak.

"You must not trust anyone!" Andy said, looking concerned. "Clearly the queen is determined to see you dead, and you must be on your guard at all times. This is serious business, Snow White, do you understand?"

Snow White was much chastened by his narrow escape this time, and declared himself fully aware of the dangers. "I will not fall victim to another of her plots," he promised them. "I see now that I have been too trusting. If anyone comes to call while you are out I will not even let them know I am home."

While the dwarves were not fully satisfied, they nonetheless had no option but to return to work the next day, for they had to keep mining to support themselves and now Snow White as well. He assured them that he would not make any further mistakes, and leaving him reluctantly, they went back to the mine.

The queen, however, became incensed when she learned from her magic mirror the next day that Snow White had once again eluded death and was still the fairest in all the land. She retreated into her most private room, where none else were allowed to go, and stayed there for three days. When she emerged from the room she wore a third, entirely different disguise and she held a perfect, red-gold apple.

Snow White recovered quickly from the effects of the poison comb and was soon busy sweeping the floor of the cottage and chopping vegetables for the evening meal of stew. When he heard a knock on the door he ignored it as he had promised and carried on with his chores. But the knocking did not stop, and soon he heard a frail voice calling, "Is anyone there? I am selling apples, and I have one here for you to taste."

Snow White stayed well away from the door. "I am not allowed to come out, nor to let anyone in," he called back.

"That's all right, my dear," said the old woman outside. "I shall just leave the apple on the window-sill, and you can taste it before you decide to buy from me."

"No, thank you," Snow White said, though he had moved closer to the window. "The dwarfs who live here have told me not to accept anything from anyone, and I do not wish to go against them as they have been so kind to me."

"Are you afraid of a mere apple? Here, I'll share it with you," the woman said, and sliced the apple in half with a sharp knife. "You take this lovely red half, and I shall have the other. It would be a shame to miss tasting such delightful fruit, don't you think?" And so saying, she took up the gold half of the apple and rested the other on the sill, eating her half with great enjoyment.

Snow White looked at the red half of the apple, glistening and smelling wonderfully of summer, and found his stomach rumbling hungrily. _It looks so inviting,_ he thought, _and the old woman has taken half for herself. There can't be anything wrong with it._ So he took up his half of the apple and bit into it. But the apple of course was poisoned, and the first piece caught in his throat as he swallowed and choked him, and Snow White fell down again, this time truly dead.

The queen watched him to make sure he did not start breathing again, and then took herself home, confident this time that her plan had succeeded. Just to make sure she went immediately to her magic mirror and asked it,

_Mirror, mirror upon the wall,  
Who is the fairest one of all?_

And for the first time in over a year the mirror replied,

_You are the fairest one of all._

And finally Queen Miranda was content.

When the dwarfs returned from the mine that evening, they found Snow White once again lying on the floor, but this time they could not rouse him no matter what they tried. He was finally and utterly dead. The dwarfs cried sorrowfully for three days and nights, for they had all loved Snow White and they would miss his smiling face every day. They made a coffin of finest crystal for him with gold script describing his lineage and placed him inside, for though he lay dead he did not decay, but remained as warm and fresh-faced as though he were only sleeping. Seeing this, the dwarfs could not bring themselves to bury him but instead kept watch over him by turns, in the vain hope that he might one day awaken from his death-sleep.

One day a noble prince who was passing through the wood came to their house and asked for shelter for the night. He was a tall and mature man, with sweeping caramel-coloured hair and intense eyes. His name was Prince Viggo and he had come on a long journey to seek a spouse for when he became king. When he came into the parlour he saw the coffin and beheld Snow White's beauty, and he fell instantly in love. He read the gold inscription on the coffin and saw that this was the prince he had come to see, and begged the dwarfs to let him take Snow White away with him.

"For this is the one I have heard tell of far and wide," he said, "and now that I have seen him for myself I could not bear to be parted from him, even for an instant. I promise you that I will never leave him alone, and should he ever awaken I will take him as my spouse and we will rule over my kingdom together. If he does not awaken still I will love him, and keep watch over him and give my rule to another. I care for nothing else but him."

The dwarfs were torn at the thought of letting Snow White go, but seeing Prince Viggo's desperation they took pity on him and decided to let him take Snow White back to his kingdom. They would miss him terribly, but the prince's need was greater than theirs and if Snow White ever woke up one day he deserved a better home than they could give him. So they bid a sad farewell to their young friend and watched Prince Viggo bear him away.

The prince arranged for the careful transportation of the coffin through the wood, bearing it to his castle after many weeks of toil. Once there he installed the coffin in his chamber and stayed there as much as possible, never taking his eyes from it, unable to focus his attention on anything else. But Snow White remained dead and soon the kingdom began to suffer from the lack of Prince Viggo's attention. His servants became frustrated with him and with the need to keep the coffin free of dust so that he could look upon it whenever he wished.

"Why are we all so concerned over the appearance of a dead youth?" one servant asked, and opened the coffin. He smacked Snow White contemptuously to one side. Prince Viggo started from his chair, pale with anger, and began to advance on the arrogant servant.

Suddenly there was a coughing gasp in the room. Prince Viggo turned his eyes to Snow White in shock – for in truth, the slap had dislodged the bite of poisoned apple from his throat and he spat it out onto the floor, gasping for breath. Prince Viggo sprang to his side and helped him to sit upright, and Snow White clung to him as tightly as he could in his weakened condition.

"I was aware," Snow White whispered to him. "All the time I lay in that coffin, I could not blink nor shut my eyes, nor could I speak. But I could hear and sense all that went on around me, and I know how you have cared for me while I lay as though dead. Thank you, my lord," and he buried his face in Prince Viggo's neck, curling as tightly as he could into the strong body. Prince Viggo cradled him close and whispered quiet words of reassurance and love into his hair, kissing along his hairline and jaw and finally, gently, the soft red mouth he had dreamed about for so long. Snow White gasped again and returned the kiss, though shyly, and put a hand on Prince Viggo's cheek.

"Tell me you will marry me," Prince Viggo requested, gazing into the blue eyes he loved so well.

Snow White looked up at him and whispered, "Tell me this is not a dream, and I will."

Kissing him again, the prince assured him that he was finally awake and that all would be well.

They planned their wedding quickly, and within a week the preparations were made. Every nobleman in the kingdom was invited, and also those in the neighbouring kingdoms, including Snow White's mother. Queen Miranda primped and pampered herself shamelessly, glorying in her reputation as once again the fairest creature in all the land. Before she left she stepped in front of her magic mirror and asked it,

_Mirror, mirror upon the wall,  
Who is the fairest one of all?_

But the mirror answered,

_You my queen are fair, it is true_   
_But the prince's love is a thousand times fairer than you._

Queen Miranda could not understand how such a thing was possible. But her curiosity and jealousy were aroused and she went to the wedding, determined to find out how beautiful her new rival was. When she arrived at Prince Viggo's castle and saw Snow White and him dancing, she understood finally that her schemes had all failed and that Snow White was forever going to be more beautiful than she. Her jealousy drove her to howl in dismay, and she fled from the castle and into her own woods, where she ran mad for several months. Finally Huntsman Bernard tracked her down and shot her for pity, and buried her just outside the castle grounds.

Prince Viggo and Snow White, however, travelled frequently between their two castles to oversee both kingdoms, and all the land prospered from their careful management and obvious love.

And they lived happily ever after.

END


End file.
